I am at it again! To be exact, it is 11.42 pm, pitch dark and an hour ago we had just returned from the chapel, where we once decided to go everyday. In fact, we took this decision about a couple of years ago but managed to keep it only as many times as all three of us had the convenience together. When I was ready, my wife wasn't; when she was ready, I had my moods elsewhere... finally my daughter never wanted to go to a church and sit there in the night....she got fed up in the first few days. The final outcome...I beg your pardon! We just managed, may be 100 days. The chapel where the Blessed Sacrament is exposed was kept open till 11 pm. I liked the surroundings...the garden always looked fresh and well nourished, and every wild growth was nipped and the uneven hedges smoothened occasionally. Sometimes, we stood in front of the grotto of our lady, while our daughter burned the candles and enjoyed until a drop of boiling paraffin burned her little finger and she howled in pain. The light that came from the street tube light, dimly lit the garden and sometimes, when it wasn't raining, we sat together and talked away. The church had a few curving steps around it, and we could just retire to a dark curve, without a soul wanting to see us.Annu, my daughter always wanted to go home early....so we never spent as much time as we wanted there.
The chapel was circular in shape. The granite floor was grained in dark uneven waves, but cold and hard, and my leg bones protested every time I sat on the bare floor. Along the wall, at the back, a few plastic chairs, and stools made of reeds were placed. People sat on them and prayed and sometimes slept. I would usually go forward, and would sit on a carpet laid just before the altar. My legs were comfortable on the smooth surface. Sitting here and praying, I grew to be less religious. I looked at the world and at everyone in the world. I saw boundaries everywhere. There is a fence, even between a wife and a husband. The tendency is to tighten these boundaries, and may be, religion created, the tallest and the most impregnable walls between people.
Great flawless writing! I am happy to see you start writing again.
ReplyDeleteI know the chapel you are talking about, its a great place to be on your spiritual self.
Keep it coming.
Justin
Thank you Justin! Blog is a great platform. I never realised it ever existed in the way I can use it. I seems simple, but I need to learn a lot more. May be, let me just write as I feel. Thank you for the complement.
ReplyDeletehi sir,
ReplyDeletegood to hear that atleast u go to church atleast few times a year! Sir,you know religion is jus a way to discipline your life and bring into urself some basic humane characteristics in you. you know i feel good wen in times of sadness and happiness, u find nobody to turn to,u find God der to support you,give his ear to listen to wat u want to say,wen u find der is not even a single soul u could trust and confide in....u find God as ur only friend....u know to ur daughter too if u could jus tell her who God is and wat he means in our life..it would be helpful to her in future...she would hav someone to turn to for support,atleast emotionally...u know God listens to me wen i feel so desperate...i can show anger,fight wid god,say watever u feel like and share wid him d topmost secret of ur life..hez my bestest and trustworthy friend of my life...and all the religious ceremonies are modes of me trying to b close to him and share ur friendship and joy wid him...its kind of going for ur friends B'day party or some spl occasion like dat of his life(Godz)...