A lump weighed heavily in my lower abdomen for the last one week. When I was alone, the cold-webbed reptile paced through my flesh and stretched itself towards my thoughts. Then it sprouted its tentacles, gripped my spirits and hurled me up like a weightless, fearful, floating body.
When I woke up it pulled its claws back and crouched to a frigid corner but would not leave me. When my lips stretched, it squeezed the smile away from my face. My words fell, dead-cold from my mouth. It came back to live with me after a long time but I don’t want him any more.
I carried my unsteady steps to the chapel again. The oil lamps still burned and their flames flickered gently in the cold draught. In the silence of the gloom, the shadow of the Blessed Sacrament fell on me. I had no reasoning to do. I huddled like a silenced lamb corned by a savage wildcat.
This is the depressive experience that I have when I: Face a failure Am hurt by an incident or person Have serious financial crunch Have break-up of relationship Or anything similar
May be, I need God in such helpless occasions. I need God because I was brought up with him, in a culture of religiosity. For people in different parts of the glob, surely, this is a different experience. Many people need a symbol to touch God, may be like the image of ‘Siva Linga’ or ‘the Blessed Sacrament’. There are others who don’t need anything, even the touch of God. I think God needs man to differ from each other.... and he will always be so.
If you really feel you have something to say, state you point of view. It will give a great encouragement to the blogger.
Very moving post. You are not alone. Most of us go through such feelings at some point of time, often many times.
ReplyDeleteThose who believe in a Higher Power, call Him/Her God, if you will, need Him at such times. The need of a reassuring touch is with us ever since were infants and experienced its comfort through the touch of the mother.
It does not matter which symbol of God you touch - they are all His in any case - as long as you touch it with faith...then His Energy will flow to you through it. Like you said, there are many who have been brought up to not need that touch. That is fine too...only they need to respect the faith of others who do.
Here is a nice post written by an atheist that you may like to read:
http://sagarone.blogspot.com/2008/08/faith-and-religion.html
nice write up.
ReplyDeleteA nice piece. It is so good that you have choosen God to be with you during such times.
ReplyDeleteYes, we all go through such times in in our lives.
Wish you all the best!
very well written... n a true observation...
ReplyDeleteReally interesting to know how u feel in such trying situations in life. Yea..it's different experience for each....anyways good work ! and keep posting !
ReplyDeleteWhatever gets ya thru the Night Brother George*
ReplyDeleteAs long as people Think with their own Minds + not place Blind Faith in Religion or more importantly the False Prophets that spew Religious Crap + instill the Fear of god in peole - George W. Bush comes to mind or Jerry Falwell (thank god he's Dead) + do not Force their Laws on people based on Phony Religion than everything is c0ol***********
+ We can ALL live Happily Everafter in Peace + Joy + Eternal Sunshine!!
Cheers George!! Billy ;)) Peace*
well...
ReplyDeleteryttn really well...
i appreciate ur raytin n feel in nerves how u feel abt da whole situation....
gud goin...
hav fun!!!
We all go through this state of mind sometime or the other.I would say this happens when our emotions take over our brains..As you mentioned at the close of your blog; when the mind is preoccupied with something unpleasant or an apprehension,a fear or the heart is heavily burdened with deep sorrow,then this feeling is very much expected.
ReplyDeleteIn such cases,one must be logically find out the reason and try to analyse it which I know is a difficult task..What to do?one has to.. .You may not get any solution at the instant .It keeps your mind active.
As you said,Leave all your worries in the hands of the providence...And HE will do the right for you.
Never put any confidence in your strength or abilities for they are effective only when HE desires.
Haven't you read''"It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man'"-Psalms118:8
No matter what;He is there to keep you free from all agonies or tensions you go through.
GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY..
Smile sir..have blessed days ahead.
I found the last sentence particularly intriguing. I was surprised no one else pointed it out. It is very thought provoking to suggest that God might have a 'need' for men to differ in their ways of faith. If everyone saw it in this light there would be no reason for competition and ill will between different faiths. Just realise that the Creator who made all these men and their faiths saw it as perfection if they followed different faiths.
ReplyDeleteIf agnostics believe that prayer is just a crutch that the mentally weak use, they use an equally soothing crutch and are just as mentally weak when they rely on their shrink:-)